What hangs in the balance

 We get asked, "now that your time is drawing near the end, what are your big takeaways from India"? What a loaded question, one I won't attempt to completely answer here and now, because our time in India has definitely changed us in so many ways and I'm not wanting to wax philosophical or get too sentimental just yet. I've also got a church talk to write today! Gah! I never sleep well until that assignment is behind me. So I'll answer that question in part on a very surface level. What souvenir do you want to bring home from India? That's easy.  Besides collecting good music, I've only got one other "collection" in my life- Figurines of women with pots or loads or baskets on their heads. 

It didn't start out deliberately as something I thought to collect. In 1986, while on my mission to Korea, I found a carving of a woman balancing a pot on her head with a baby on her back. I sent it home as a gift to my mother telling her it was an apt metaphor of motherhood; finding the precarious balance between life work and childcare. To me it also personified the strength of women to bear the many burdens put upon them. When my mother passed away and her possessions were divvied up, the figurine became mine again. 

Time passed. I married, bore 4 daughters and raised them as best I could, feeling the burdens of motherhood like so many generations before me, trying all the while to balance the many needs of my growing family on my proverbial head and shoulders.

When my oldest daughter Cassandra was in college, she did a study program in Zambia, Africa. It may have been unintentional on her part but as a momento of her time there, she gave me a wooden carving of a woman with, what else? A pot on her head! Thus, organically it sprouted the idea of collecting "women in balance" figurines from wherever we traveled. I loved the fact that it was already 3 generations in the making. And I loved that it had at its core the message of finding balance in our lives as we bear its burdens.

Since then I've found it to be a universal motif in developing countries, which just happens to be the places I've traveled to. Mostly. I now have added to my Korea and Zambia collection from the various countries that I've visited, or where others have traveled and have given to me, including ones from Mexico, Peru, Jamaica, Dominican Republic, Honduras, and Cambodia. As the world transforms to high tech, these relics are bound to become obsolete. 

So from the time we first arrived, as I scanned various markets and stores in India, there was very little "art for arts sake" to be found. It was all very much tied to Hindu religious idols depicting their gods and goddesses. I found plenty of real-life women doing the balancing act as you can see from the few photos I've captured but no art depicting them. As the months passed, I knew time was ticking. As a total default, I found a ceramic figurine in Erode of a woman sitting with a basket on the ground, not on her head. Ehh...I bought it thinking that might be the closest thing I could get. Then, just about the time I had given up the search, right outside our office building one day near the end of January, was a sidewalk bazaar. There was a booth of wooden toys and little men but none with women with pots on their head. So I asked the merchant if he had any and he said he did! He would send me his online catalogue. Finally, I found the lady I had been searching for all year with only a little bit of time left in the balance.

Not only is she balancing a pot, but she's balancing it with another passion -- her music! How perfect for me! I consider it a tender mercy that I could find this figurine to symbolically remind me of my time here in India and can add her to my collection. I found what I was hoping to find and now only one more thing is left undone with just a short time remaining in the balance.

This week was fairly routine save two standouts. Sunday, Joel came again to church. We had our music class and missionary discussion like the week before. Afterwards, we invited him and the 3 Indian Elders to come to Sunday dinner. We'd make American soup and Elders Bora and Kaithwas would make dal. Joel would prepare the rice and he and Elder Massey would help with the coleslaw. Every guest really wanted to help and contribute. It was the busiest kitchen scene ever with 5 men wearing aprons! I was definitely outnumbered. It was all I could do to get out of their way and just set the table and be the photojournalist.

                     Men's Day in the kitchen

                  Many hands make light work

                 Except mine doing Jazz Hands

We will treasure these relationships and memories so much!  I get sweeping feelings of sadness when I realize they are soon to end. Ah dang, I said I wasn't going to get sappy. 

 One last sweet experience of the week happened with Elder Massey in the office. Of the entire missionary force, with the exception of our 2 Nepalis and our 6 Sri Lankans, there are only 5 remaining Elders left who are going to the temple next week to receive their endowments, he being one of them. He was the very last elder to attend the India MTC in Hyderabad, now all of our local missionaries are being sent to the Bangkok MTC prior to their mission. I offered to help him find the names of his male relatives who he could take with him to do their ordinance work for. We got on Family Search to look at his family tree. He was lacking some vital information for some people and he needed the permission to perform the ordinances from the nearest relative for others. So we fudged the rules in these circumstances just a little. I let him get on my phone to call his mom and we got on Facebook to contact his Aunty about getting her permission, which she was more than happy to give. She is actually a member who lives in Utah and was the first family member to join the church and introduce the rest of them to the restored gospel. As we entered the required information of his ancestors, the green temples started popping up! We printed off the cards for three of his male relatives. When I explained to him this could be the most significant gathering of Israel he'll do on his mission, he was visibly overjoyed at the thought!

     Elder Massey is not by nature a bouyant personality but he was simply ecstatic at the thought of taking his father Kamal Massey, his uncle Sanjay Massey, and his maternal grandfather Michael Robert with him on his upcoming temple journey. And he was offering them baptism and the required ordinances 

needed for salvation and exaltation just like the missionaries offer the ordinance of baptism to people still living. I could tell he was pondering these truths in his heart and it made him so happy. I smiled the rest of the day too every time I saw his joy and excitement. This is a special elder whose future we wonder about after we leave. He has become very dear to us and he seems to be thriving in the office environment. But how will he do after we leave? We will leave the answer to that question in God's capable hands. We thank the Lord we've had this opportunity to work with him. It's been a blessing. Sometimes people are here on earth not only for their own salvation but to help everyone around them with needed experience for their own growth and learning. Perhaps part of his mission is a test for all of us, from the President on up, down to his companions and fellow missionaries, to see if we are learning the lessons Jesus Christ would have us learn about love, compassion, and patience. For the most part I have merely endured my office assignment and will be quite glad when it's over but this short time with Elder Massey will definitely be one of the major takeaways of our mission that will have a lasting impact on us. Relationships are eternal when they occur in the framework of Christ's kingdom and our ongoing mantra is "people meet for a reason". And dear friends, especially those that teach us something, are the best souvenirs of all. 

Wherefore...seek ye earnestly the best gifts, always remembering for what they are given. To every man is given a gift by the Spirit of God, in order that every member may be profited thereby.

D&C 46: 8, 11, 29